Movie Review: ‘The Night Watchmen’

If you can't have fun watching The Night Watchmen, there may be no hope for you.

The Night Watchmen Movie Review

If you can’t have fun watching The Night Watchmen, there may be no hope for you.

The film feels like you dusted off an old VCR and popped in a movie that you dug out of your closet because it has this cool 80’s vibe: the sensibility, music (it’s got a synthesizer running throughout the soundtrack, typical of an 80’s horror film) and attitude.

After Baltimore’s beloved hometown clown is killed in Romania, his body is sent home where it’s accidentally stored overnight at the Baltimore Gazette. The overnight security guards – Ken (Ken Arnold), Luca (Dan DeLuca) and Jiggetts (Kevin Jiggetts) – have no problem harboring the body of a dead clown because they’re busy hazing the new guy, Rajeeve (Max Gray Wilbur).

It’s not long though before strange things begin to happen. And since it’s Baltimore, you know things are about to get weird.

One by one, the late night office workers begin to disappear and the gang quickly finds out what is going on. They’re all dead, they’re all zombies and they’re freakin’ hungry.

Watchmen is filled with blood, guts, flatulence and more zombie clowns then you can shake a stick at and there’s never a dull moment. Ken Arnold plays the ultimate Baltimoron; he’s confident and cocky when he’s got no reason to be and the only reason he’s lasted this long is because of pure dumb confident luck. And if you listen closely, you’ll hear a hint of a Baltimore accent. The cast knows what kind of movie they’re in and they play it to the hilt, to often times hilarious effect. Kara Luiz brings some much needed intelligence to the group and Dan Franko brings the funny in his (too few) scenes.

Written by Arnold, DeLuca and Jamie Nash and directed by Mitchell Altieri, the ending easily sets up a sequel and one can only hope that this band of blowhards makes it back for round two.

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