‘Spike Heels’ (Georgie): “Yeah, right, he ‘gave’ me the damn job”

Spike Heels monologues

'Spike Heels' by Theresa Rebeck

From: Play

Type: Dramedy

Character: Georgie was born on the “wrong” side of the tracks and is the only one of her family to move to the city and to get a job to support herself. Sassy and witty, hot-tempered and on a short fuse.

Gender: Female

Age Range: 20's | 30's

Summary: A contemporary comedy of manners which explores sexual harassment, misplaced amour, and the possibility of a four sided love triangle. The combatants are a sexy, volatile young woman and three Back Bay types a writer, a lawyer and a fiancee in sensible shoes. The setting is Boston, the ending is happy and laughter abounds.

More: Buy the Play

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GEORGIE: Yeah, right, he “gave” me the damn job. I f—ing work my a— off for that jerk; he doesn’t give me s—. I earn it, you know? He “gave” me the job. I just love that. What does that mean, that I should be working at McDonald’s or something, that’s what I really deserve or something? Bullshit. F— you, that is such f—ing bulls—. You think I don’t know how to behave in public or something?

Jesus, I was a godd— waitress for seven years, the customers f—ing loved me. You think I talk like this in front of strangers; you think I don’t have a brain in my head or something? That is so f—ing condescending. Anytime I lose my temper, I’m crazy, is that it? You don’t know why I threw that pencil, you just assume. You just make these assumptions. Well, f— you, Andrew. I mean it. F— you.

I mean, I just love that. You don’t even know. You’ve never seen me in that office. You think I’m like, incapable of acting like somebody I’m not? For four months I’ve been scared to death but I do it, you know. I take messages, I call the court, I write his damn letters. I watch my mouth, I dress like this – whatever this is; these are the ugliest clothes I have ever seen – I am gracious, I am bright, I am promising. I am being this other person for them because I do want this job but there is a point beyond which I will not be f—d with! So you finally push me beyond that point, and I throw the pencil and now you’re going to tell me that that is my problem? What, do you guys think you hold all the cards or something? You think you have the last word on reality? You do, you think that anything you do to me is okay, and anything I do is f—d because I’m not using the right words. I’m, like, throwing pencils and saying f— you, I’m speaking another language, that’s my problem. And the thing is – I am America. You know? You guys are not America. You think you are; Jesus Christ, you guys think you own the world. I mean, who made up these rules, Andrew? And do you actually think we’re buying it?

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