‘Hairspray’ (Velma): “We do NOT touch ourselves – anywhere – while on camera”

HAIRSPRAY the MUSICAL by Thomas Meehan & Mark O’Donnell

From: Musical

Type: Comedic

Character: Velma Von Tussle, Amber's attractive and overbearing mother. She's also the director of Baltimore's Corny Collins Show.

Gender: Female

Age Range: 30's | 40's | 50's

Summary: Velma directs the teen dancers at the opening of the Corny Collins Show.

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VELMA: And we’re off! All right, people, how many times do I have to tell you – We do NOT touch ourselves – anywhere – while on camera. Tammy, lose the padding. You too, Fender. (the kids sheepishly turn away to remove their padding) And Link, stop hogging the camera; you’re not Elvis yet.  Amber… Hog the camera. And YOU, Mr. Collins! None of that Detroit sound today.  You have something against Connie Francis? They’re kids, Corny.  That’s why we have to steer them in the white direction… I mean… you know what I mean. Ah, ah, ah!  None of that!  Save your personal lives for the camera! And we’re back in five… four… three…

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