MIKE: You know, Stan, I feel sorry for you. (Mike speaks loudly now, playing to the cafeteria.) Oh but I do. All too well. You’re the man. Captain of the basketball team. Dates the pretty girls. High school is your kingdom. But, People, Stan’s a bully. Why? It would be way too easy to say Stan preys on the weak because he’s simply a dick. No, Stan’s more complex than that. According to leading psychiatrists Stan is a bully for 1 of 3 reasons. 1, under all that male bravado there’s an insecure little girl banging on the closet door trying to get out. 2, like a caveman, Stan’s brain is underdeveloped. Therefore Stan is unable to use self-control so he acts out aggressively. And the third reason – I’d argue that Stan suffers from all 3.