‘500 Days of Summer’ (Tom): “I say to hell with it!”

Monologue from 500 Days of Summer

'500 Days of Summer' by Scott Neustadter & Michael H. Weber

From: Movie
Type: Dramedy

Character: Tom Hansen, a trained architect who works as a writer at a greeting card company
Gender: Male
Age Range: 20's

Summary: Tom let's his boss know how he feels about his job and "love"

More: Watch the movie

Click here to download the monologue

TOM: You know what… I say to hell with it! Let’s level with America. Or at least make them speak for themselves! I mean, seriously, what’s this… (picks a card off the table) “Congratulations on your new baby.” Eh … How bout … “Congratulations on your new baby… Guess that’s it for hanging out. Nice knowing ya.”

(picks up a card) Oh wait, what’s this? Ooh look at all the pretty hearts. Let’s open it up. “Happy Valentine’s Day, Sweetheart. I love you.” Oh that’s nice. Aint love grand? (beat) See this is what I’m talking about.  What’s that even mean, “love?” Do you know? Do you? Does anyone?

If someone gave me this card, Mr. Vance … I would eat it.  It’s these cards and these movies and these pop songs. They’re to blame for all the lies, the heartache, everything! We’re responsible! (beat) I’m responsible.

I think we do a bad thing here. People should be able to say how they feel, how they really feel, without some strangers putting words in their mouths. Words like “love” that don’t mean shit.

I’m sorry Mr. Vance, but I quit. There’s enough bullshit in the world without my help.


Leave a Reply

‘Call Me By Your Name’ Star Timothée Chalamet: “What scares me is being boring”
"At a certain point I was able to come to grips with the idea to just 'be.'" - Timothée Chalamet
‘Phantom Thread’ Star Lesley Manville: “It’s so easy to make someone bad look good on film. In theatre, there’s no hiding place”
"Filming is different. You’re getting a moment right. You can go in and create something very good, very quickly. That’s a different challenge to having five, six weeks to rehearse a play.” - Lesley Manville
Chadwick Boseman on ‘Black Panther’ and How He Refocused His Career
"As soon as I came to L.A., things immediately shifted for me." - Chadwick Boseman
Bernadette Peters on Returning to Broadway and Why She is Still Trying to Improve Her Craft
"You have to do your best to fulfill the role, not fulfill yourself" - Bernadette Peters
Ellen Pompeo: “Acting, to me, is boring”
"Anybody can be good on a show season one and two. Can you be good 14 years later? Now, that's a f*ckin' skill." - Ellen Pompeo